Alright so...

yesterday (monday) I went to my friend Alex's youth group (catholic) after I got home from rehearsal. It was kind of interesting. It was "Open Mic Night" which basically meant that whatever we wanted to talk about, we talked about. So, the argument eventually turned to politics and the Presidential race. Alex is my best friend. We have known eachother since 1st grade and have never fought since. But we argue. Constantly. We are complete opposites. He is Hardcore conservative, I am a hardcore liberal. He loves to fight, I'm a pacifist. He loves hispanic food, I love Italian. He's Catholic, I'm Leveyan. Everything we could possibly argue about, we do. So there we are, dominating the rest of the room, arguing with eachother, when the leader (his name is Kevin) says, "You two are best friends, aren't you?" It was hysterical. Anywho, so I'm still distraught about this chick that attempted (and almost succeeded) at tearing my heart open. Not because I want her or anything, but the fact that we were such good friends that had so much in common, and now I can't even bring myself to look her in the eye. I want... I don't know what I want, just not this. I'm so furious with her, yet I want her to come begging on her hands and knees, I couldn't even tell you why... I dunno, just some thoughts for the day...

Homecoming

allow me to exfoliate my feelings towards the homecoming dance: I hate it. With a fiery passion within my soul. Its not that I hate it because I don't like dancing, but the reverse, I hate it because I LOVE dancing, and am frankly disgusted by "grinding," which is all that takes place at our dances now. However, I really like dancing with friends and whoever I might have a crush on (which varies rapidly) so I always end up spending the $20 in order to dress up and rub my crotch against others. This year, I'm taking my homeschooled friend Catie because she needs a date in order to come, and I'm a good friend, and this year this girl from local high school Blake is coming, Megan, and I'm working up a little crush (EXTREMELY little mind you) on her, so I figure that ought to make for a fun night. =]

so, since the first post, shit's gone down son

so the day after my first post, me and Girl B hung out, and we ended up holding hands and stuff (nothing beyond just holding) but I was excited out of my mind. The next day her and my best friend started going out. WHAT THE FUCKKKKKKKKKKKK?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! SO, as you can see, I WAS PISSED. I've gotten over it by now, but thats just because I've learned how to deal with this kind of shit. So anyways, I feel led on, Hardcore, and I'm not happy about it. Or rather, I wasn't happy about it, until last night, when I went to my friends sweet sixteen (which was amazing.) At her sweet sixteen I sort of mixed and mingled and wound up with a date to homecoming (who knew?) So I'm in a much better mood considering a couple days ago I had my heart abruptly broken. As for Girl A, I talked it over with her and it's all cool now. So I think everything will work out =]
Much Love
Riley J.

AAAH

So I have a problem. My problem is that I'm romantically involved with a girl, but day by day I'm finding I like someone else more and more. Right now I'm at the point where I feel like she's my soul mate. I still like the girl I'm "with" (which we're not technically going out due to parental issues) but I'm falling head first in LOVE with this other girl. I don't want to hurt anyone, but being with Girl B (names are clearly not being disclosed) just seems so right, and i want it SO BADLY.